Cadaver Swords by Emmett Swan- ARC Review

Witty and Sarcastic Bookclub

Image result for cadaver swordsChimber was a master grave digger and knew his business. But when the Queen of the nation of Dalmeer called out the Gravedigger’s Guild to bury thousands of citizens that had perished from a mysterious poison-laced cloud, he was not prepared for what he found. Before his very eyes, bodies thought dead began to rise up, walk, and huddle together in dark groups. Soon, an unstoppable cadaver army was laying waste to the land.

With the good people of Dalmeer under siege and the army in disarray, Chimber wants to do his part to defend his home town. But as a gravedigger, he isn’t usually needed until after the killing is done. As he watches a battle unfold from the cover of a nearby hill, an unflappable female warrior gets felled from her horse by a mob of cadavers. Risking life and limb, he slides down to the battlefield and…

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The Beast and the Bethany by Jack Meggitt-Phillips-The Write Reads Book Tour

Beauty comes at a price. And not one knows that better than Ebenezer Tweezer, who has stayed beautiful for 511 years. How, you may wonder? Ebenezer simply has to feed the beast in the attic of his mansion. In return for meals of performing monkeys, statues of Winston Churchill, and the occasional cactus, Ebenezer gets potions that keep him young and beautiful, as well as other presents.

But the beast grows ever greedier with each meal, and one day he announces that he’d like to eat a nice, juicy child next. Ebenezer has never done anything quite this terrible to hold onto his wonderful life. Still, he finds the absolutely snottiest, naughtiest, and most frankly unpleasant child he can and prepares to feed her to the beast.

The child, Bethany, may just be more than Ebenezer bargained for. She’s certainly a really rather rude houseguest, but Ebenezer still finds himself wishing she didn’t have to be gobbled up after all. Could it be Bethany is less meal-worthy and more…friend-worthy? (taken from Amazon)

I’m so excited to be joining in The Write Reads blog tour today! The Beast and the Bethany will be available for purchase on December eighth (Psst! This would make a great Christmas gift!).

Take The Picture of Dorian Gray , and make it less gothic and more fun, and you’ve got The Beast and the Bethany. This book follows Ebenezer Tweezer, a 511 year-old who is ridiculously rich and remarkably spry for his age. His secret? He has a beast hidden in his attic. Ebenezer feeds the beast in exchange for a potion that keeps him young. At first, the beast wants small things, but as time goes on its appetite grows and…well, let’s just say that the beast is not a vegetarian.

Eventually, Ebenezer is asked to put a child on the beast’s menu. Ebenezer finds this vaguely upsetting, but not enough to keep him from bringing Bethany home. Bethany is a brat. There’s no way to sugarcoat it. Then again, can someone who’s planning on feeding his houseguest to a monster really make judgments? Ebenezer can handle her staying with him prior to the Big Meal. It’s only for a little while, after all. Then it’s bon apetit! But then something unexpected happens: Bethany and Ebenezer start to become friends! Whatever shall Ebenezer do?

This book is monstrously delightful! Bethany and Ebenezer are the most likable jerks that I’ve ever had the pleasure to read about. They’re good for each other, and it was wonderful seeing them slowly change (just a little!) and learn to appreciate each other. I particularly loved Ebenezer and seeing how he’s basically been going through a mid-life crisis for the last fifty plus years.

The way the story is told is perfect for older elementary and middle-grade kids, but it will keep any age group entertained. The language is simple and snappy, and the book is a quick read, though the concepts are most understood and appreciated by the slightly older crowd. My oldest will be reading The Picture of Dorian Gray in school this year and I’m adding The Beast and the Bethany to his curriculum. I know he’ll love it! I may have to make it a read-aloud so I have an excuse to enjoy it again.

Much like the beast, I gobbled this up and I’m hungry for more. This author is fantastic! I most definitely recommend picking this book up. If you have kids, buy this for them. If you don’t, buy it for you. It’s a great read!

Prelude for Lost Souls by Helene Dunbar

In the town of St. Hilaire, most make their living by talking to the dead. In the summer, the town gates open to tourists seeking answers while all activity is controlled by The Guild, a sinister ruling body that sees everything.

Dec Hampton has lived there his entire life, but ever since his parents died, he’s been done with it. He knows he has to leave before anyone has a chance to stop him.

His best friend Russ won’t be surprised when Dec leaves-but he will be heartbroken. Russ is a good medium, maybe even a great one. He’s made sacrifices for his gift and will do whatever he can to gain entry to The Guild, even embracing dark forces and contacting the most elusive ghost in town.

But when the train of Annie Krylova, the paino prodigy whose music has been Dec’s main source of solace, breaks down outside of town, it sets off an unexpected chain of events. And in St. Hilaire, there are no such things as coincidences. (taken from Amazon)

Thank you to Netgalley for providing me with this book in exchange for my honest opinion. This book is available for purchase now.

I am not entirely sure why, but this book just wasn’t my bag. I just couldn’t get into it at all. It could be the way it’s told. It switches back and forth between multiple narrators, which normally doesn’t bother me all that much. In this case, though, I really didn’t care at all about two of the characters, so their chapters didn’t keep me engaged.

The idea of a town with sort of a cult feel to it has loads of potential. You could take it in a dark direction, or just keep it fun. However, despite being mentioned very early on, The Guild (which basically runs the town) didn’t really make its presence known in a way that lived up to the reputation the author had created for it. I was just expecting more.

I thought Russ was a fascinating character. The lengths he was willing to go to in order to be the best…zoinks, yo! I didn’t really understand his friendship with Dec, possibly because it was already falling apart when the book started. He and Dec wanted fundamentally different things, and they struggled to accept that. It was kind of a bummer, but it definitely added to the story.

Dec and Annie just weren’t all that interesting. Annie, unfortunately, didn’t seem to add all that much to the narrative. I really can’t put my finger on why I wasn’t a big fan of Dec. I should have liked him and I have no idea why I was less than thrilled by the chapters he narrated. That just happens sometimes.

As I write this, I realize this is a pretty negative review, so let me hasten to add: I didn’t hate the book. The plot is unique, there is a ton of potential for the continuing story, and Russ was a complicated character (I love complicated characters!). When it comes right down to it, this wasn’t the right book for me. Everything that felt a little off to me might be exactly what would make someone else absolutely love this book.



Where Dreams Descend by Janella Angeles

Where Dreams Descend (Kingdom of Cards, #1) by Janella Angeles

In a city covered in ice and ruin, a group of magicians face off in a daring game of magical feats to find the next headliner of the Conquering Circus, only to find themselves under the threat of an unseen danger striking behind the scenes.

As each act becomes more and more risky and the number of missing magicians piles up, three are forced to reckon with their secrets before the darkness comes for them next.

The Star: Kallia, a powerful showgirl out to prove she’s the best no matter the cost

The Master: Jack, the enigmatic keeper of the club, and more than one lie told

The Magician: Demarco, the brooding judge with a dark past he can no longer hide

Where Dreams Descend is the startling and romantic first book in Janella Angeles’ debut Kingdom of Cards fantasy duology where magic is both celebrated and feared, and no heart is left unscathed. (taken from Amazon)

Thank you to Wednesday Books for providing me with this book in exchange for my honest opinion. This book will be available for purchase on August 25th.

I was interested in this book because a review said that fans of The Night Circus would love it. I must say, I have no idea why the review said that, since the two books are so incredibly different. However, I still found this book to be incredibly enjoyable.

Kallia is a very powerful magician. When the book opens, she works for the enigmatic Jack (also known as The Master) in a club known as Hell House. She lives on his estate, a pampered but lonely existence. Kallia dreams of leaving and travelling to the city of Glorian. When she sees a flyer advertising a competition for magicians she seizes her chance, despite Jack’s warnings against leaving.

Kallia is the only female in the competition, and it is clear from the beginning that she is not wanted. She expected that, though, and it doesn’t stop her. In fact, it makes her even more determined to make her mark. Strange doings start and what began as a competition turns into something far deadlier.

What makes this book stand out are the fantastic characters. On top of Kallia, there’s Canary, a fire eater; Aaros, a thief-turned-magician’s assistant; and Demarco, a judge from the competition who’s hiding something. And, of course, there’s Jack. I didn’t love Kallia because she’s so convinced that everyone is against her, even the people who are in her corner. She’s very prickly. However, it made her incredibly interesting. The other characters were all very well-developed. Jack is my favorite. He’s such a mystery. There’s obviously more to him than is revealed in this book, and I can’t wait to see where his story-line goes.

The magic itself was very interesting, kind of a combination between stage tricks and the real thing. Author Janella Angeles gave each character their own artistic flare, so things were constantly surprising and intriguing me.

This book ends on a cliff hanger, leaving me desperate to see what happens next. I loved it. The stakes were raised and there are loose ends waiting to be tied up. If the sequel continues in the vein of this book, it’s going to be a doozy.

This book was a blast. I highly recommend it.

Kings and Daemons (The Gifted and the Cursed book 1) by Marcus Lee

Kings and Daemons by Marcus Lee

A tale of conquest, dark kings, and daemonic heroes. A spellbinding story that will enchant you with its plot of ambition, love, betrayal, sacrifice and redemption. Over fifty years have passed since Daleth the seemingly immortal Witch-King and his army conquered the Ember Kingdom.Now, with the once fertile lands and its enslaved people dying around him, the Witch-King, driven by his insatiable thirst for eternal youth, prepares his forces to march on the prosperous neighbouring Freestates. It will be the beginnings of a conquest that could destroy nations, bringing death and destruction on an unimaginable scale.Then, when a peasant huntress whose rare gift was concealed from birth is exposed, it sets in motion a chain of events that could alter the destiny of generations to come. (taken from Amazon)
Wowza, Kings and Daemons was fantastic! This book felt very old-school fantasy to me – and I loved it! It had so many of the elements that I love to see in fantasy. A group of characters to follow? Check. Inner conflict to match the external struggles? Check. Fantastical creatures? Check (daemons: need I say more). A terrifying Big Bad who is deliciously evil? Check.

Despite having these well-known and well-loved fantasy building blocks, this book is in no way a copy of other works. It is wholly original and incredibly creative. The characters were fantastic. I loved them all, but at the moment my favorite is Kalas. I reserve the right to change my mind, however. Each character has so much going on that not only provides fascinating backstories, but explains their personalities and the choices they make.

The world is grim and bleak, but not enough so that it killed my reading mojo. I know that sentence makes next to no sense, but sometimes a world is too dark for me to enjoy -this wasn’t the case here. The shades of despair in this book were nuanced and offset by the sheer waves of stick-to-itness that the characters possessed. Here was a group who had taken their hits and were still kicking. I love characters like that!

The pacing was fabulous. The story started moving and never stopped. I was immediately drawn in and I stayed enthralled from beginning to end. Everything unfolded with perfect timing and nothing felt forced. There was no dreaded info-dump. It was obvious that the author knew exactly what story he wanted to tell and confidently went about doing it.

The world was incredibly well-developed. The history was fascinating, and I’m excited to see it explored even more in future installments. In case you can’t tell, this is my long-winded way of saying Kings and Daemons was fantastic and I highly recommend it.

Dead Man in a Ditch by Luke Arnold- ARC Review

Dead Man in a Ditch by Luke Arnold
The name’s Fetch Phillips — what do you need?

Cover a Gnome with a crossbow while he does a dodgy deal? Sure.
Find out who killed Lance Niles, the big-shot businessman who just arrived in town? I’ll give it shot.
Help an old-lady Elf track down her husband’s murderer? That’s right up my alley.
What I don’t do, because it’s impossible, is search for a way to bring the goddamn magic back.
Rumors got out about what happened with the Professor, so now people keep asking me to fix the world.
But there’s no magic in this story. Just dead friends, twisted miracles, and a secret machine made to deliver a single shot of murder. (taken from Amazon)

Thank you to Netgalley for providing me with this book in exchange for my honest opinion. This is the sequel to The Last Smile in Sunder City. You can find my review for that book here Dead Man in a Ditch will be available on September 22nd.

Dead Man in a Ditch picks up pretty much right after the end of book one. I expected this series to be rather episodic, to be honest, each book being a case that Fetch Phillips finds himself caught up in. Instead, the series has a continuing story-line, back stories are explored, new characters are introduced, and surprises are revealed.

Sunder City is full of grime, violence, and a fair hint of desperation. So is Fetch Phillips. They make for an excellent match. This city is full of once-magical creatures who are struggling to get by in a post-magic world. One of the many things I loved is how author Luke Arnold explores how it would feel for a being who is mostly magic to be bereft of it. His narrative voice is fantastic. There’s a Sam Spade feel to it, although Fetch has become much more introspective than he was in book one. This evolution of character feels natural and makes perfect sense in the story.

Fetch Phillips’ latest tangle (I’d say “case,” but it gets out of hand much too quickly to qualify as one) involves magic. It shouldn’t: it’s been established that all the magic is gone. However, someone seems to have missed the memo. Fetch finds himself trying to solve a murder and figure out if-  and how – the magic is actually returning.

I love how delightfully madcap this book is. Running through it is more of Fetch’s backstory, and some serious character development. We get a closer look at this new, messed up, magic-free world. I’m annoyed at the author: he had me tearing up over the fate of a unicorn.  Grr!  I became so invested in this book, I had to stop myself from rereading it as soon as I finished the last page.

I would say that the tone of this book is more serious than the first book, but not so much that reading it is a downer. Rather, it draws you in. The stakes are higher and the fate of many hinges on decisions made by a small few. It’s kind of messed up, actually. I’m sure Fetch would agree.

This is a fantasy like no other. It’s gritty and dark, but still has an undercurrent of hope running through it. It showcases how wonderfully broad the fantasy genre really is. I loved every moment of it.  If you haven’t started this series yet, you need to make it a priority. Just go ahead and shift it right up to the top of your “to be read” pile. I guarantee you’ll love it too.

Shakespeare for Squirrels by Christopher Moore

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Set adrift by his pirate crew, Pocket of Dog Snogging—last seen in The Serpent of Venice—washes up on the sun-bleached shores of Greece, where he hopes to dazzle the Duke with his comedic brilliance and become his trusted fool.

But the island is in turmoil. Egeus, the Duke’s minister, is furious that his daughter Hermia is determined to marry Demetrius, instead of Lysander, the man he has chosen for her. The Duke decrees that if, by the time of the wedding, Hermia still refuses to marry Lysander, she shall be executed . . . or consigned to a nunnery. Pocket, being Pocket, cannot help but point out that this decree is complete bollocks, and that the Duke is an egregious weasel for having even suggested it. Irritated by the fool’s impudence, the Duke orders his death. With the Duke’s guards in pursuit, Pocket makes a daring escape.

He soon stumbles into the wooded realm of the fairy king Oberon, who, as luck would have it, IS short a fool. His jester Robin Goodfellow—the mischievous sprite better known as Puck—was found dead. Murdered. Oberon makes Pocket an offer he can’t refuse: he will make Pocket his fool and have his death sentence lifted if Pocket finds out who killed Robin Goodfellow. But as anyone who is even vaguely aware of the Bard’s most performed play ever will know, nearly every character has a motive for wanting the mischievous sprite dead.

With too many suspects and too little time, Pocket must work his own kind of magic to find the truth, save his neck, and ensure that all ends well. (taken from Amazon)

I am both surprised and excited to say that I won this book in a Goodreads giveaway. It is available for purchase now.

Funny, witty, and a bit heavy on the raunch, this is Christopher Moore in top form. Shakespeare for Squirrels felt like having a conversation with someone while incredibly sleep-deprived: not much makes sense, and it’s all hilarious anyway.  While this book is technically a continuation of a storyline (Pocket the Fool is a recurring character), you don’t need to read any of the previous books to enjoy this one. All you need is a healthy appreciation for the absurd.

This isn’t a satire of A Midsummer Night’s Dream; it’s a full-out mugging. If you have a deep respect for Shakespeare in its original form, this might be a bit too much for you. Honestly, though, the Bard had a dirty mind himself, it seems to me. It’s about time someone pointed that out.

Pocket is still very much Pocket, meaning he’s a delightful mess. I love that character, and it was a blast to see him again. The author’s train of thought sometimes jumped its track, going from odd to utterly ridiculous, but in the very best way. If Monty Python wrote books of their skits instead of performing them on TV, the results might be something similar to this.

If you don’t care for dirty humor, this book won’t be up your alley. If you like books that lovingly mock Shakespeare, if you like irreverent humor, and if you find yourself cackling at risque comments, this book is for you.

Timothy Mean and the Time Machine 2 by William A.E. Ford, illustrated by Marcelo Simonetti

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Thank you to the author for providing me with this book in exchange for my honest opinion. This is the second picture book following little Timothy Mean. You can find my review for book one here. Both books are available for purchase now.

Timothy Mean has an amazing imagination and a penchant for trouble. Both of these qualities send him on some fantastic time-traveling escapades, courtesy of his trusty homemade time machine. The first book saw him visit dinosaurs, vikings, and more. The second book included more historical figures, such as Leonardo Da Vinci, and Albert Einstein.

My little Toddler Tornado loves historical figures. This book is right up his alley. It’s silly and fun, but it also offers the chance for a parent to explain a little bit about who these historical figures were (or not: I think that’s the homeschool parent in me taking over).

The narrative rhymes and has a nice cadence to it. The book tells the story simply and well, without becoming too wordy to keep a little one’s attention. Of course, a picture book needs good illustrations, and the ones in this story are amazing! The author and illustrator worked together to tell a fantastic tale through both words and pictures.

As much as I enjoyed the first book, I think this one might be even better. I highly recommend picking up both books in this series. They are perfect for younger elementary-aged children.

Midnight Sisters by Sarah E. Boucher

Midnight Sisters: A Retelling of the Twelve Dancing Princesses by [Sarah E Boucher]
Do not meddle with the Master’s daughters.The words rattled around Jonas’ head. What was the punishment again? Death? Dismemberment? Jonas, the newest addition to the gardening staff, can’t recall the exact penalty for breaking the rule. What does it matter anyway? He would never dream of meddling with the Earl of Bromhurst’s haughty daughters. Until he comes face to face with Lady Ariela, the eldest of the Master’s daughters. Her elusive smile and open manner cause him to question his convictions. In no time, he’s drawn into Lady Ariela’s world of mystery and intrigue, a world where she and her sisters will do anything—including leaving twelve empty beds at midnight—to escape their father’s strict rules.Only Jonas can uncover the truth and save them from their father’s wrath and their own folly, if he is willing to risk everything he’s ever worked for.Midnight Sisters is a reimagining of the classic fairy tale The Twelve Dancing Princesses that will win the hearts of readers of all ages. (taken from Amazon)

 

Once Upon a Time…there was a reimagining of The Twelve Dancing Princesses. I really liked that fairy tale when I was a child, so I thought I’d give this book a go. It looked to be a far cry from the other recent retelling of this tale, so I was curious about the direction the author would take.

The reader grabs her trusty bookmark and is ready for adventure. The story-line was relatively close to the original tale, with minor changes here and there. The main character is a gardener named Jonas. He has the misfortune to fall in love with one of the king’s daughters, the one thing all the staff is warned against. As he gets to know the princess better, he starts to think he is the only one who can save all of the princesses from both their father and themselves.

There are dangers ahead.  Unfortunately, I had a bit of an issue with the main character. Jonas seemed forever surprised that the princess had the ability to be both attractive and intelligent. A misogynist hero isn’t quite to my liking. He was also kind of a jerk to his fellow gardener who was in a similar situation. As for his fellow gardener: he vacillated between using any female who seemed to find him attractive and being a decent guy. He was the most likable character in the book, however. I suppose that sort of says something about the characters.

Magic abounds. While it took a while to get flowing, the story settled into a nice pacing. It was obvious that the author is a fan of the original fairy tale and she carried some of that wonder over to Midnight Sisters. The setting felt very real and was well thought out.

They lived happily ever after? To be entirely honest, this book fell a little flat. I place the blame on the characters. It’s hard to enjoy a book when the characters are so difficult to read about. I don’t mind having a character that’s a little rough around the edges, or even a character that’s a jerk, as long as they aren’t all like that. If you don’t mind wanting to smack each character multiple times throughout the book, Midnight Sisters might be enjoyable for you.

Why is Sherlock Holmes So Popular? It’s Elementary

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Every once in a while, a book character comes along and changes things. Not just for one reader (although that is also a huge accomplishment), but for society in general. This character moves from the page to everyday culture. This is what has happened with Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes.
Phrases like, “The game is afoot,” and “no s***, Sherlock” are ubiquitous. Almost everyone at least knows who Sherlock Holmes is. Now, the question is: why? Sherlock himself is actually a very unlikable character. He’s too smart for his own good, is constantly making everyone else look less-than-competent, and is less demonstrative of his feelings than others often are. So, what makes this unlikable character so darn likable?

I think a good chunk of his charm is the way he was written. Arthur Conan Doyle was fantastic at bringing his characters to life. He could also craft a mystery like no other. Even though some of the conclusions Holmes comes to border on the impossible, Doyle makes the reader want to suspend disbelief. We like thinking that there is someone out there who can solve the difficult problems and can bring the bad guy to justice. Of course, it does bear mentioning that literary Holmes did not, in fact, solve every case. That only serves to make him an even more interesting character. Contemporary mysteries almost always end with “good” prevailing. Seeing know-it-all Holmes be wrong every once in a while only serves to make him a more three-dimensional character.

Whatever the reason, Doyle’s famous detective has given birth to many books, movies, plays, and TV shows that all aim to do one thing: show their love of Sherlock Holmes. There are books that are at least partially inspired by Holmes, such as Jackaby by William Ritter and A Study in Charlotte by Brittany Cavallaro; books that include their own versions of the actual characters, such at the Young Sherlock Holmes series by Andy Lane and Mycroft Holmes by Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (although, I would never have thought of Mycroft in the way he’s written); and of course, more TV and movie adaptations than you can shake a stick at. Basil Rathbone’s version, and the incredible BBC TV show happen to by my favorites on screen.

At any rate, I’ve noticed something rather odd: it seems that more people are enjoying the things based on Sherlock Holmes than reading the original itself. Honestly, though, I think it’s important to read the original Conan Doyle stories. Aside from the fact that they are fantastic, they will bring a deeper appreciation to the other versions that we all enjoy. If, like me, you have a love of the one and only Sherlock Holmes, I’ve listed a few new takes on the famous detective below. However, if you haven’t read the original Sherlock Holmes, I implore you to give them a go.

– A Study in Charlotte by Brittany Cavallaro
The Strange Case of the Alchemist’s Daughter by Thodora Goss (I haven’t read this one yet)
-The Improbable Adventures of Sherlock Holmes edited by John Joseph Adams
Moriarty by Anthony Horrowitz
Mycroft Holmes by Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
Jackaby by William Ritter
– Young Sherlock Holmes by Andy Lane
Sherlock Holmes- The Improbable Prisoner by Stuart Douglas

Which ones have I missed that I need to read?